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‘One More Chance’ reincarnated as musical
Musical theater is booming. Pinoys are not lacking for shows to watch anymore......»»
Sky-high irony
Gokongwei-owned Cebu Pacific, a budget airline that always manages to raise eyebrows, has once again blessed us with a seat sale. Oh, how lucky can we be? The airline has hyped up anew its marketing mantra that “Every Juan flies,” only weeks after being forced during a congressional hearing to confront 3,000 complaints of irate customers over its endearing practice of overbooking flights and offloading passengers. To be obstinately hooked on the jingle of cash registers while ignoring the suffering of your paying customers takes a unique kind of expertise, of being able to remain deadpan and sleep at night through the turmoil of your aggravated passengers. For many of those who attended the hearings, Cebu Pacific only cares about the cold ca-ching of its cash registers. No doubt, the seat sale it resurrected last week would result in more passengers being kicked off flights. Overbooking and the accompanying forced passenger dumping, in Cebu Pacific’s vision of reality, well, there’s just a “slight chance” of that. That’s a joke, right? But no one’s laughing, as the joke is on us, the public. Let the sentence hang there for a while. “Slight chance,” they say in an entry on airlineratings.com, as though they’re talking about the prospect of seeing a rare unicorn galloping around the departure gate. But no, this is not about fantastical creatures; rather, it is about reservations piling up on a shaky table like a house of cards. It involves accepting the idea of reserved seating as merely a suggestion, a fun idea to play around with. That is if your idea of fun is being forced to reprise the role of Tom Hanks in the movie, The Terminal. Speaking of whimsical, have you ever heard of their brilliant response to situations in which appeals to “volunteers not to travel on their booked flights” fall on deaf ears? Cebu Pacific has your inconvenience covered, so do not be alarmed. They’ve cleverly reserved the power to refuse boarding to travelers “involuntarily,” or against their will, if involuntarily is not clear enough. This translates to passengers gnashing their teeth, pulling their hair, and tearing up their shirts all they want at CebuPac’s check-in counters, without any chance of boarding a flight for which they’d been sold “reserved” seats. However, let’s not limit our discussion to Cebu Pacific’s poetic handling of passenger interactions. Let’s explore the drama that occurred during the probe of the Senate Committee on Tourism. Senators turned their attention to the airline’s fervent devotion to overbooking as the cause of this comedy of errors, becoming unimpressed by the inventive justifications offered by the company for canceled flights and interminable delays. One senator related tales of suffering and annoyance from her own staff as well as from other passengers. Inevitably, as the hours passed, the hearing evolved into a “grief-sharing session.” People stepped up, spilling stories of delayed flights and canceled hopes. If you will, picture a traveler hoping to leave Tokyo but being compelled to crash on the chilly, hard floor of Narita International Airport. Her offense? Having faith in Cebu Pacific to deliver even the most basic amenities. Then there was the dentistry board exam that was almost missed. How about the flight to Cebu from Manila that was diverted to Busuanga and the haggling that followed to force Cebu Pacific to honor its “Passenger Rights” guarantee of free hotel accommodations? The cherry on top? While those who had been put through the wringer were left wondering how the airline’s priorities seemed to be joyously dancing in the skies, the examinee’s lucky aunt, all the way from Australia, managed to score a ticket for a lovely fee. The spokespersons of Cebu Pacific did, however, exhibit some artistic talent. Lightning strikes, bird crashes, and even runway debris were included in the gallery of “freak incidents” they presented as the causes of their errors. During the sleeper hearing, the way Cebu Pacific’s flight operations unfolded resembled an elaborate opera, complete with loud fights and dramatic exits, as if the cosmos had conspired to make it happen. But what was the highlight of Cebu Pacific’s ludicrous theater? Respect for the “Air Passenger Bill of Rights.” To pledge loyalty to rights that seem to exist only in the world of press releases is a truly great gesture. Amid this flying fiasco, passengers may wonder if they are only pawns in a much bigger game when the airline offers its earnest apologies, makes a few promises, and reveals plans for standby aircraft as if they were doing magic. So here we are, seeing the re-erection of Cebu Pacific’s circus tent of antics. Seat sale? Rubbish. The post Sky-high irony appeared first on Daily Tribune......»»
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